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Sand Saga ….. or ….. The Tale of Little Big Foot !

The Hare felt it was important  to recognise the 11th of the 11th so we were directed off into the distance with warnings of sand, trenches and (maybe) danger. (Hashing is dangerous !)
So, like Frank Herbert’s DUNE Trilogy,, we were like giant sand worms, rolling about trying not to feel the pain, going in and out and up and down ! Running on sand was, so I am told by the brave runners, very hard going on the calves etc. but as a drink stop was arranged in the trenches, we were all spurned on to keep going.
Walkers soon discovered that we had a perfectly good road parallel to the sand torture trail but did we decide to veer off … no way ….. Hashers through and through ! Anyway, the rest of the troops arrived at the drink stop, red faced and complaining about the sand (again) so refreshed, we all set off back to the start.
Circle was called quickly as for once no-one was lost ! The Hare got a down-down but with accolades of a great run ! Not sadly for his positioning of the foot to indicate where the run was … actually, in the mode of war, he did good as he confused the enemy (& Skippy)
Despite the sand, this was one of those bush areas full of wildflowers enjoyed by all. Can’t remember any blood loss so no lame duck and not a huge number of charges all round.However there was a little moment, forever etched in our memories when El Keeno (who should have known better) questioned why our orange foot had 2 feet on it – one big, one little ??? He was informed in no uncertain terms by Passiona (the wise …) that it had Hash historic relevance and had been made many years ago ! Shame on you El K !
We then retreated (figuratively speaking as we had defeated the enemy) into the sunset getting ready for next weeks run – (Its HASH NOSH – bring eating irons)
Pink Bits x

The Really Flat Run in HILL St Goosebury HILL

Well, there we have it … it was to be a FLAT run (not) and as DOSH and Wacuda were setting it, it must have to be a challenging one !
It was – but mostly for the runners … they disappeared and were not seen again for some time ! Walkers were warned by DOSH that there was a nasty bit of down and then a nasty bit up – BUT after that …. THE DRINK STOP ! (one for walkers and a separate one for runners) followed by a flat return … It was all that … and some …
We had a fairly significant uphill moment (sort of steps ?? tree roots ???) but once at the drink stop and enjoying the bubbly it was all forgotten (bit like having a baby ! … well not exactly …..) The trail was full of lovely spring flowers so we really enjoyed our walk. Not sure about the runners though, as will be explained later, as there was a lot of blood. A LOT OF BLOOD !!!
We all returned to the start and the circle began in earnest with the Hare’s getting the first down-downs. The RA was not too fussed this week so charges were mostly from the pack – the usual suspects but spectacularly – Scooby Doo got the lame duck award for copious amounts of blood (blood rule was applied ie. bandages and TLC from DOSH) Scooby was trying hard to stretch the leg so it wouldn’t seize up, but think it did !
Also, we had a visitor from Portugal, who was only here for a short time but was going to check out Hash Harriers in Porto, his home town.
All in all,we then had a few nibblies and finished off our refreshments. Then we set off back into the early evening … 5 pm start was a success with everyone turning up on time … even Skimpy and Co.
Pink Bits xxx

Ghosts, Ghouls & Witches ….. OOOOO !

So began the Halloween version of Hills Hash this year … set by Skippy from the local cemetery ! We were all assembled in ghoulish attire (some more than others !) and waited for instructions. Most of the pack had made an effort and were resplendent in stuff but, those who weren’t, had attire inflicted on them by Leapfrog or Pink Bits (who both, always, have surplus costumes)
Anyway, the Hare gave concise instructions that were not complete (as if ….. ) and sent us on our way. He did mention a drink stop so we were gung-ho !
The run and walk veered off from each other but not too far as runners heard the horn now and then  … There was a bit of confusion for walkers with a sign saying SW or LW  ….. so some took the LW and others (knowing by intuition where the drink stop was going to be … !) took the SW. Funnily enough, the pack converged at the Leapfrog/Passiona’s place for the welcome cooling beverages.
Back in the circle, we had lots of laughs with the charges given to the Hare, Franger. visitor D-Cell, Skimpy & anyone else that made eye contact with stand-in RA Passiona !
We ended the circle with our Hash song …. not very well … but we will work on it !
Till next week ….. AT 5 PM – at 5 PM – at 5 PM
See you then
Pink Bits x

Rain Stopped Play ….. !

Well, not exactly but it was a ferocious weather day and P M Had some significant challenges all day whilst (good old fashioned word … !) setting the run, Lets face it, when you go to the effort of setting a run and the rain wrecks your work,  it is a bit annoying. Still, with cheerful snigger, PM set the pack off in various directions, assuring all that it was a short run. Yeah ……. right ……. It is PM we are talking about !
Walkers went up a GENTLE slope, while runners JUST WENT UP A BIG BLOODY HILL ….. didn’t they Franger ? No drink stop and 40 minutes later we were all back (or so we thought ….. )
A message from the Safety Committee : PLEEZE contact someone (usually Pink Bits … self appointed Health and Safety Occifer) then we knows – you is safe an all that ! Taking photos of fab fluffy ferns is OK but  …. lets have a call to alert us of your quirks !
Needless to say, (but I will)  everyone was back in the normal 24 hours (!) and it was a great run, despite the hurdles.
Also, added bonus, was Light My Fire’s great Hash Nosh – Thai Green curry and Pink Bits version of Birthday cake (chocolates)
On – On
P B x

A Very Hashy Breakfast !

In a departure from the usual Hash run, we met at the Weir Rose Garden for a breakfast eggstravaganza ! Slightly dazed and confused, as it was morning, the usual suspects assembled in raincoats and all manner of wet weather gear as it was, lets say, damp, wet & windy as heck !
In a brief moment of sunshine (*its picking up*  says Leapfrog !?) we were given run instructions.  Of course the trail had been well and truly washed away but being the confident Hare’s that they are, Leapfrog/Passiona  set us off …..Go that way >>>>>>>>> sort of ……..
So the runners, grimacing as it started to drizzle, set of at the usual cracking pace (run fast in rain = less wet)  while walkers tramped up the slight hill and disappeared !
Meanwhile, the grand breakfast preparations were going full steam ahead…. well when I say full steam, I mean half steam as only one of the BBQ plates were working. Drat ! …… Then the invasion of the body(bun) snatchers…..oops I mean …magpies, parrots and ravens began in earnest ! Keeping them away was a full time job. Jousting with umbrellas worked for a while …
When the pack returned, we decided to have a progressive breakfast, moving from one set of BBQ’s to another. This in itself was quite hazardous (Hashing is dangerous !) as Passiona would confirm .. bun in beak of maggie ! It was a funny moment … seriously !
We decided to hold over the circle & charges till next week even though the illustrious RA had returned from her secret RA business. Too cold/damp/wet
No-one went home hungry at least ! There was even hot coffee …..
On – On
Pink Bits x

The Messing of the Dogs …….

Hashers were congregating on Darlington Oval’s “doggie paradise” patch. The weather was good, the company was jovial and the dogs were ….everywhere !
The hares, Trainwreck & Shagged Out, went to a lot of trouble to make sure we would be entertained and could follow a well marked trail.
Runners and walkers set off in opposite directions and soon enjoyed a bush track with wildflowers aplenty. Being in D’ton, we were soon aware that there were a few hills (?) but nothing too complicated for walkers at least ! It is getting a little warmer so those uphill treks are starting to bring on a light sweat but what about the flies … they were about in force (was it something to do with the dogs ?) and sticky.
Back at the start (walkers came back first) some of us investigated the *doggie memorial*  stump across the oval. Ahhh !
Once the runners staggered back on wobbly legs and had partaken of some refreshment, the circle was called and the charges flew thick and fast. As the RA is still absent (at a special retreat for RA’s …. nudge nudge … wink wink…) the stand-in, Dripper,  inflicted down-downs, some well deserved and some not so well deserved to all and sundry (what about those pesky other dogs I say …. charge their owners for too much fun …)
All in all, it was a great run with care and attention to detail. Just missing a drink stop ….
On – On
Pink Bits  x

The Unimaginably Non-Confusing and Potentially Almost Run !

To start with, this was Skimpy’s run and he was only a Co-Hare as other valiant Hashers stepped in to *normalise* the trail.
We gathered just down the road from the abode of the Skipsters and soon found we were many. (not everyone gets nervous when Skimpy is Hare)
Instructions, (Oh Heavens above …) were actually from the trail setters so we had a decent idea of where we were going and what sort of trail to look for, as opposed the windmill arm actions of Skimpy !
Runners and walkers set off in opposite directions but into some delightful bush complete with wildflowers and BIG roos (one flashed across our walk and was almost chased by a few Hash dogs !) It was a great walk but, so I heard, not so fantastic a run … a bit of a shemozzle to be exact with false trails being false and checks being circles …..
Meanwhile we all met at the drink stop, which was a moving feast, stopping  like an ice-cream van … whenever you waved.
Most of the pack followed the runners back so there was a log crossing and some obstacles, but we all ended up back at the start with no losses.
Once the circle was called,  the charges were thick and fast for the Hares, moving on to Virgin Runner (welcome … both of you !) long time no-sees and returnees. It was a lot of work for the Monk who had to charge himself at one point as did Trainwreck, who was just missing out !
Great day followed by a beacon lit to alert low flying aircraft that could have almost melted the fuselage. Certainly warmed the cockles of the Hashers who stood too close.
P. B. x

Every Which Way …… ? (with 2 drink stops !)

This was a seriously beautiful day to have our first ever run in Whiteman Park that encompassed some lovely scenery and bushland.
OK … it was a bit flat (but so are Guildford runs  … ?) but it was very pleasant.
Hares Dripper & Pink Bits gave a few instructions (like to mind out for trains, trams, wayward Kubota’s, cattle, wildlife and water … lots of water !)
Runners and walkers set off in opposite directions … walkers were following blue poles (the Jackson Pollock walk ?) and runners went off in some random circling direction virtually covering a lot of the park. A few false trails fooled a few (Ha Ha) but not to confusing.
All the pack miraculously combined, at the same time, at the great LOOKOUT high up (just so we could say there was a climb …) overlooking the swamp with bird life. This was also the first drink stop with a tablecloth and fancy cocktail glasses ……
Then on to the bird hide just a few metres ahead for a *bird eye view* over the swamp (and strategically positioned ducks ….well done Pink Bits )
Here was drink stop 2 (without tablecloth or cocktail glasses ….)
We all got back within the hour so there were nibblies and a quick circle. As the RA was absent, the stand-in RA (Dripper) had to fine himself for the run which by all accounts was good. Otherwise a few charges were doled out and we departed the park well before the closing time.
Whiteman Park Wonderful……
Pink Bits  x

WOW … So Many Options For A Title …!

This week’s run started with a *Human Foot* marking a NEW direction … because the Hare CHANGED HIS MIND ….. What the …..? A human foot ???
Then we eventually gathered outside some unsuspecting folks gate to riffle through their verge throw out that was quickly depleted (Oh … we do have some squirrels in the pack)
The pack got sent off on an uphill track (Yuk) that did level out and encompassed some spectacular scenery and, eventually, a welcome drink stop, albeit on a dull track by a big tree with an esky well hid ! It really was a good drink stop ….. ! Most welcome …! As walkers were first on the scene we had the major part of refreshments and moved on …
It seems that the runners did find the remains …. (Tee Hee)
Another great moment was the fact that 3 (Yes 3) generations of a family *got lost….waylaid …. or just had too much fun at the drink stop*  and came very late, running in carrying the esky ! Oh Boy are we good !!! (It was empty … !)
The fun did not stop there … In the circle, we had blood … blood on the tracks (as per Mr DYLAN) so the Lame Duck came out ! However, there was a competition as to who earned it most ! (Really !)
Finally, the front running B******S were rewarded with the very latest award named *Titty-Winx*  You just had to be there as Leapfrog was soooooo chuffed with her purchase !
As a slight aside Porno – person (?) turned up so late and as the Hare had changed his mind (female side apparently) tried to do the run backwards. Fortunately, he was not too traumatised and joined a few of us for a curry afterwards ….. !
The exhausted Pink Bits x

Hills House Warming

Super sunny Sunday had the pack cosy parking on the verge at Dosh and Wacuda’s new abode. After a few escorted tours around, we were directed to the On-On
Walkers followed a very well marked trail that took in a bit of bush track and runners had similar. There were not many hills in these parts and even less water but lovely wildflowers dotted about.
It seemed that the runners were quick this week so got back in record time before the walkers who straggled in eventually ! We had a few nibblies before the circle was called and the Hare got his down-down (well deserved) The Monk took over and lashed out a few charges then opened the floor. This led to silly, silly charges and after all were exhausted we regrouped around a fire and yummy soup & bread supper.
Thanks Dosh/Wacuda for your hospitality !
On On